I found out through the grapevine that the tenative expiration date of my job is going to be May 31, 2019. Eleven months away. This is when a new facility opens up and makes my present job unnecessary. Upon that date, my job will no longer be but I will continue to be, but in a capacity that is unknown at this time. This feels like dying to me in a way, and at the same time the birthing of an untold number of possibilities, and I wonder if I will even be there until The End because I have little to lose in staying other than doing (yet another) favor for The Company, which won't miss me much when I'm gone. Operations will commence in the new facility and to get the thing up and running will take up all of my many harried managers' time so if I was expecting any personal attention I'm afraid their attention will be directed elsewhere. So where does that leave me?
In some sort of in-between states limbo. Not knowing what comes next, I'm faced with the slowly but steadily approaching end of my present 'career' and in exploring the other options available I'm not too excited at what is being offered. I've been through this before and it's like moving. Once you've gone through the process you never really want to do it again.
Matt Lamers- Unsplash.com
Yuk.
But then again, you never really know what's coming next and if you think you do, The Universe already has a role for you in mind, I think, and I'm sure it has a role for me because I've been around FAR longer that the nearly three years of service at my present job and I know that that counts for something more than can be comprehended.
They call this being an 'old soul'. I've been around considerably longer than just this lifetime, though lifetimes, at times- and this is one of them- can seem pretty real and convincingly singular. What I am facing at present is what a lot of old souls from time to time face, which is having to exert themselves, 'cuz old souls don't really like to do that. Comfortable almost wherever they are, old souls have learned to make wherever they find themselves feel like home. They don't reach for the stars because they've been there, done that, they've had that experience and found out that that, like everything else, passes. What old souls like is the deeper stuff, the richer, more satisfying roles to play and because of that they can get stuck in cozy ruts but The Universe will act to move them along because they're needed somewhere, always needed, because young souls are causing tremors in The Force and old souls need to be around them (but not too close!) to balance things out.
So I'm not worried so much about what my next gig is going to be. I know The Universe's Human Resource department is VERY aware of what I'm facing and that they have some opportunities in mind lined up for me to step into, probably even before I'm 'ready' for them, because as an old soul your part is you still have to get you arse up off the couch.
Ugh!
Stay tuned.
I'll be.