Nothing To See Here

I'm starting to get a little dizzy as concerns the news cycle. I get on the news one day and juicy details are revealed which surely must lead to something, the ones bringing these tidbits seeming to be reputable, and then the next day (couple of hours, an hour, fifteen minutes later) that which was brought forth is 

Disowned

Disregarded

Disputed

Disavowed

and 

Disparaged

which brings to me

Despair 

for I was hoping to see something good come of it. Surely there must be some substance to what is being presented because many of the people bringing information forth are 

Distinguished

far beyond my paltry level of recognition, and rightly so, for they have spent years, decades, and even entire careers in their fields and are privy to information that I, Joe General Public, may not be aware of. Strangely, though,

Distrust

of any and all sources is now 

Declared

to be the sensible course to take until each side has more than had their say and all the confusing 'facts' are in which begs the question "Do we now have to question everybody’s word?”. This seems ludicrous because I was raised to believe that the people who were in Public Service positions were already beyond much in the way of reproach or suspicion because they were honest, capable people who had been bestowed their lofty status by

Discerning

voters. Governing was a Noble Cause, attracting, at best, the brightest and most selfless but I have sadly over the years understood that many elected officials have issues with ethics. It is 

Discouraging 

to say the least,

Lots of people played a part in the building of this country.

Fabien Barral- Unsplash.com

Disheartening

as well, but not all hope is lost. It can never be lost because the intrepid pioneers that built this country brought hope with them and firmly instilled it into this land, hope being undoubtedly the most valuable thing in their possession! They were 

Determined

because what they were leaving behind was highly

Dysfunctional

and they wanted better. Bailing from The Homeland, any one, is a 

Desperate

move and I seriously doubt they were thinking 'adventure travel' when they left. It takes a crazy amount of

Determination 

to carve a civilization out of the wilderness, which most of this land was, and though the Native Americans had to lose for the interlopers to win, it only brings into sharp focus the precarious toehold on survival the settlers (immigrants) knew, for they had burned their bridges behind them to heaps of ash and weren’t going to be getting back on any ships.

They sought equality and mainly got 

Disparity

but maybe that was because they didn't try hard enough, as goes The Story. One that continues to this day because the governors of the land say it is 

Difficult

to 

Discover 

    why certain things are the way they are but they're 'working on it'. In the meantime, 

Display 

a brave face and think the kinds of thoughts that come into the minds of those assured they are in good hands.

And though the

Difference

between what is presented at this time as being 'real' and what is not is highly

Discombobulating

and

Dissatisfying

to any thinking person, 

Disrespectful 

as regards one's intelligence, not to mention

Distracting

Disorientating

Disinteresting

Disgruntling

Disgraceful

Disconcerting

and

Distasteful

to boot, I think that sooner or later some one(s) will step up and serve with 

Distinction,

they being 

Disinclined

to

Dismiss

Disproportional

levels of enfranchisement. Some may 

Disagree,

and vehemently so, because they are 

Disaccustomed

to having limits placed on their appetites but

Distressing

as that may be, it will not be met by 

Disapproval

from the sons and daughters of the pioneers. 

There's No 'I' In Team

Goes the saying, which coaches and companies use over and over as a motivational tool. I thought when I was born I was on a team, Team USA, but was I ever dreaming!

  Sure, there's been a general sense of being on the same boat, and of living under the same banner, star spangled, but damn...   ...lately...

     Doesn't mean this ship has to sail into the shoals though, or end up on the rocks. Maybe the multitude of captains we have on board can hash it out and agree upon a course of action that benefits the many of us along for the ride. 

The Original A Team

(Unsplash.com)

Just sayin'.

This ship has been in trouble before and has righted itself but "Oh man!" this ride we're on has suddenly taken us into the damn Bermuda Triangle or somethin' and the past, future, and present are all swirling and mingling in a dimensionally folding karmacological time warp! 

Which ain't good, way it looks, though looks can be deceiving.

Hard to make sense of which way to steer, hard to make sense of even what the people on deck are yelling into each other’s ears 'cuz that's all warbled. Forget about how we got here, the only question now is “How do we get out?”.

Mist is all around us and "Is that the sky above us or a reflection of the water?" many wonder while the compass spins 'round and 'round. I think I can see people from the past walking toward us right atop what looks like the ocean but that can't be happening!

(a squadron of planes swiftly flies by overhead, their engines droning like they did in the 1940’s)

"Sheesh! There goes Flight 19!" 

And then bam, not a minute after that, we're out of it. The mist clears and most of us are standing around feeling to see if we still have all our parts while others are slumped over on the deck moaning or are grasping railings and retching over the side. The sky is bright blue and the water is calm and we're making headway, the bow is throwing up spray and the mist is receeding behind us. 

Captain(s) we still have, and some of them are cornering their officers and telling them that they're going to have to write a full report but really, 

"WHO’S GONNA BELIEVE THIS?!”

The Art Of Belittlement

In the political arena is nothing new. If you do a little research on the internet you can find that puttin' down the opposition has always been Standard Practice. Politicians throughout the ages have minimalized their opponents through words, cut 'em down to size. 

And when you cut something down to size, then stand next to it, you seem bigger in comparison. Here's one from you know who, just the other day:

(referring to Justin Amash, Michigan GOP representative, who called for impeachment)

"A total lightweight...."     "....a loser...." (and a bunch of other 'commentary' that won't be repeated here. If you wanna know it, Google it).

Nothing good to say for a man of his own party! You'd think the response would've been more of a scolding nature, a "Tsk tsk!" sort of response, but to say a guy is a total lightweight and loser is hardcore, no holds barred stuff intended to reduce Amash's political career to rubble so don't think that this is a game for sissies. All or nothing is how you know who rolls. For- or against. No gray area.

Yeah. We know that.

But let's go back a hunnert plus years and hear what good old Abe Lincoln said about his opponent, Stephen Douglas:

"His argument is as thin as the homeopathic soup that was made by boiling the shadow of a pigeon that had been starved to death"

No Mr. Nice Guy there, Abe! 

Another thing I’d like to say about my esteemed colleague from across the aisle…

Remoind De Zuinga- Unsplash.com

Or how about some quips from across the pond, issued by those lovable British gents?

Former British Prime Minister Benjamin Disraeli on former British Prime Minister William Gladstone:

  "If Gladstone fells into the Thames, that would be a misfortune. If anybody pulled him out, that, I suppose, would be a calamity"

Ouch. 

Or this one, from John Montagu, 4th Earl of Sandwich, after a heated argument with John Wilkes, British radical, journalist, and politician:

"Sir, I do not know whether you will die on the gallows or from the pox!"

(Wilkes) "That, sir, depends on whether I first embrace your Lordship's principles or your Lordship's mistressess".

(!!!)

I must say, the last three were pretty elegant and the first one was only minor league, like the lowbrow level of insults opponents jab each other with in All Star Wrestling but hey- you gotta play to your audience. 

Gonna leave you with this one, my fav, from Democratic presidential hopeful Adalai Stevenson, regarding the election of 1952:

"I have been thinking that I might make a proposition to my Republican friends… ...that if they stop telling lies about the Democrats, we will stop telling the truth about them".

(I don't think he was the guy that originally used this quote, thought it up, but it fits the times, the strange days we're in).

Keep breathing, stay present.

The Ol' Ballgame

(This ‘filler’ was written yesterday, while the author was otherwise contemplating more serious fare, many writing sessions deemed by him not quite feeling what he wanted to publish, and shelved)

The Ol' Ballgame

     On Memorial Day, even. 

Yeah, there's nothing like taking a trip to the ol' ballpark. Nothing says 'day off' like a day spent sitting in the stands. 

Forget about how long it took to drive there, or how far away you had to park. Once you're in your seat and looking around at the thousands of other layabouts, you immediately feel like kin. Today is our day to be entertained. 

“Vendor! I'll have one of those bags of 'poor man's lunch' (peanuts) up heah, and they'd better be salted" ('cuz tomorrow is when I'll be thinking about health matters). "Brew vendor! Up heah!" ('cuz I'm thirsty and I don't want to people watch (and game watch) sober). Today's my day. 

The Boys are givin' it their all on the field, doin' their job, and we're keeping half a mind on them and what's going on around us in the stands but that's baseball, right? It's a leisurely affair, unless we're in the playoffs. But that's months away, even if we manage to get there, so for now down on the field it's batter up, fly ball, strike out, 2-1 pitch, line drive to center field, people reaching for pop fly foul balls in the stands, or scramblin' for ones that weren't caught. 

Used to be you could light up at the games but that ain't no more. Commonplace was the sight of the flickering of hundreds of Zippo lighters around the stadium along with constant wafts of smoke but unless you're a senior you have no idea that games were like that, unless you study old footage. Nowadays they have strict rules against partaking and just might usher you out, past the security checkpoints that weren't there either but hey, there's still enough going on to keep you entertained- like eating. 

The upper deck perspective.

Robert Bye- Unsplash.com

Have a brat, then, a corndog, footlong, or Philly, whatever the local favorite is and for you health conscious ones (even on your day off!) there's healthier choices available. I think 'wraps' are a common enough option. 

The food areas are located just off 'the tunnel' and sure enough "Yay it's a home run!" or "Damn it's a pop fly with bases loaded!" roars the crowd and I missed seein' it 'cuz I had to go and was in the john just for a minute but I heard the fan reaction, even in there. 

One of these days I'm going to pony up the money for a behind the plate seat, or for one of those equally pricey ones, the ones at field level along the first or third base line, but I always seem to put that off and get the nosebleed seats on the upper decks or the bleacher bum ones in the 'rockpile', out in the far corners of the outfield where the rowdy people hang out. It's on my bucket list. 

And I like to watch the kids, the young boys thinking that they might get a shot one day, and the young girls hangin' with their daddies (thinkin' now that they got a shot too) and it's a good thing. Baseball is the kind of sport that brings people together as all the usual politics, office disputes, and coworker and neighbor issues are shelved. Forgotten for awhile. 

One of my fantasies is numerous times facing a series of those major league pitchers when the heat is on, the crowd is watching, and I'm in the batter's box. I kinda know what that's like, I played Minor League and Little League and was considered good but didn't get past some guy in Pony League throwing some serious heat, a lanky guy named LaPorte or something. I thought if that ape woulda beaned me I woulda ended up with a concussion or dead, there was so much on his fastball, but maybe I coulda got used to it. Maybe I coulda adjusted and got a hit, or knocked it outta the park. 

Anyway, I didn't get my shot but like everybody else in the stands, I can live vicariously through the players on the field. I got my favorites. I'm sure you got yours. 

So here's to baseball season. "One of the best damn ways to spend a summer's evening!" 

Quality Of Life

        In a legal first, I filed a 'Quality Of Life' lawsuit against the state I was living in, which may make its way (hopefully) to the Supreme Court. 

        I figured "Why not?" after overhearing my Nth 'Right To Life' argument, probably while washing dishes with the TV on, where I couldn't change the channel soon enough 'cuz my hands were covered in suds. Listening to the back and forth, I could see that a legal loophole existed for if nobody could agree whether or not certain ones had a right to life, the quality of that life couldn't be far behind. Those affected by deficient amounts of Quality Of Life were certain to sue, and I wanted to be first in line.

Conferring with my hastily assembled legal team, it was agreed that while my complaint had not been brought forth to any court before, it had sufficient legal grounds to be presented, i.e., it had merit. 

  Certainly it couldn't be dismissed as frivolous, for if one had a Right To Life it surely followed that one had an equal right to Quality Of Life. How 'quality' was presently determined was that some authoritative entity followed the usual guidelines used to determine the value of things. They scanned the overall reach of society, looked to see where ones were situated, and through doing that a certain mean was found, a middle ground, one that was used to ascertain a 'benchmark' level of quality. One that was deemed 'acceptable'.

But my legal team's argument was that not only was Quality Of Life a financial and moral issue it was also a highly personal one for wasn't it up to the individual to determine what 'Quality Of Life' meant? This could not come through governmental decree for it would deny the individual’s 'Right Of Expression', a concept highly tied to Quality Of Life. For example, if I personally determined that perpetual bass fishing was essential to achieve Quality Of Life, could I be expected to be content were I relegated to perform the drugery of Formula One racing? 

Furthermore, as an at-heart perpetual bass fisherman, now turned Formula One race car driver, I would be grieviously prevented from even going near a calm, still lake full of bass and would suffer immeasureable psychological anguish to the degree that I could bankrupt any of a number of municipalities, perhaps even counties, and maybe even a whole state (the pain and suffering awards that innocently injured subjects previously received setting legal and financial precedent in such cases). While being placed in a race car driver's position could be argued as less than accidental, I could still be deemed a 'victim' as the level of suffering amassed would be deemed equal to that which any innocent injured person ever endured, in my legal council's estimation. 

  As it was, I was not in my complaint denied Quality Of Life in soooo extreme a manner but on the basis of denial I filed my claim anyway, which went through a series of lesser courts and experienced favorable rulings. My argument was presented thus:

"The playing of basketball alone is not sufficient grounds for the gaping disparity of income that exists between worker bee me and Player A of the Phoenix Suns. It indisputably follows, then, that my Quality Of Life (key words there) is nowhere near that of Player A. In a sane and progressive world, such exposure to imbalance would be looked upon as monstrous, abhorrent, and abominable. Since I know what those words mean, it decries a degree of intelligence and discernment that brings to me full knowledge of said disparity and with it, intense and implacable feelings of suffering to which I plead relief from to this court. My lawyers have in their possession documents and statements attesting to the veracity of recurring distressing states of mind that such exposure has caused me, which they can bring up to the bench, and of the numerous times I have been placed in such extreme states of agitation that it has required consolation, psychoanalysis, meditation, medication, and intervention even, to be employed, due to this ongoing injustice"

The higher courts pondered my claim with calm deliberation before agreeing that indeed I was one so aggrieved but these victories of mine were only temporary, for they were immediately and repeatedly appealed by state's counsel. In order to secure relief I had to take my case all the way to the Supreme Court, the highest in the land, whose decision was final and would stand 'forevermore'. 

It took many years, nearly three and a half, to have my case upon their docket and when that momentous day came, my lawyers (and theirs) were prepared for battle. Fierce legalese was passed back and forth in the courtroom that day, and over the many ones that followed, as the justices heard passionate arguments for and against my case. They then heard final, closing arguments, after which they retreated to consider the verdict, one that was probably going to hinge on a single vote for or against. 

Perfect conditions for fishing!

Rose Elena- Unsplash.com

After many days of deliberation, a decision was reached and all parties involved in the suit were summoned privately into the hallowed arena to hear what the justices had determined. I was nervous in the extreme, yet confident that my cause, even if it should fail, had at least during the trial opened the eyes of the observing public and those of some in the nation. Stronger cases were certain to follow mine. When the verdict was read, however, all my trepidation vanishied. I found I was immensely pleased and high-fived my stellar legal team repeatedly. The justice's decison was this:

"Quality Of Life is a given. Those granted life must be allowed to express it to the fullest extent allowable by law, as well as within the moral bounds of mutual human respect and decency. Perhaps the most commonly followed bounds that apply here are the words brought down from Mt. Sinai by Moses, the words in our Constitution, and the words in our Bill Of Rights. Though some of those are moral guidelines- not laws- they create an outline for everyone to experience at least a baseline Quality Of Life.

'Quality Of Life' is believed to mainly come about through individual will and determination but we find that to be an incompletely scrutinized mere assumption. Through investigative examination it is revealed that the Game Of Life is one that is tremendously skewed, highly favoring the already advantaged. While it is true that some graduate from meager initial means to lofty heights the majority do not and thus cannot be said to even remotely experience or know what they are missing due to their being placed, and long conditioned, to accept realities far different from those above. This unfortunate fact of life has always been the case and to those many the court considers itself fortunate and stands relieved, for it cannot begin to address their complaints. The court's luck in this matter rests on the fact that any of them presenting or even conceiving of bringing an actual lawsuit to the bench is highly unlikely, almost ludicrous.

"However, in the matter of the one who stands before us, we award a basketball players' annual salary in compensation. Case adjourned!"

“What the @*$#!” cried the state's lawyers, in unison, as the justices rose and began to file towards their chambers. "This is ridiculous! It sets a precedent sure to be followed by tens of millions, if not hundreds of millions!"

The final Supreme Court judge stopped just before exiting. He turned to the state's lawyers and said "This decision will never be made public. It is to be an 'out of court settlement’ and you will pony up. The media will be told that the case was thrown out and sent back to the lower courts for reconsideration, which, as you know, is something that will likely tie it up for years".

"So why didn't you do just that? Send it back to the lower courts? Why did you make a ruling at all?!"

"We had to. The defendant's cause was just. It just doesn't have to be publicly known! Justice has to be served by us and sometimes that dish comes out frosty cold"

"But justice was not served! This will cost our state millions of dollars! How is that 'justice'?"

The final judge paused, scratched his chin some, looked upwards, then sighed resignedly before speaking. 

"Consider it a warning shot across the bow. The time for further favorable rulings in such matters has come. Times are a'changing. What used to be acceptable won't be for much longer. It can't be denied or explained away that the income gap doesn't cause damage any more than denying life itself causes damage, but what that damage is is left up to the courts to decide. We are placed in an unpleasant position, you see? We can't deny the reality of these issues away, like you do, for we're at the end of the line. Yes or no, we have to decide. Though you and your kind may dream up thousands of theories and explanations and then use them to befuddle minds, galvanize certain factions, and sway voters, we are tasked with bringing contentious matters down to detached and dispassionate reasonings. We then reduce those to the best plausible interpretation of the facts we have at hand. "What fits, in the current time, in our current understanding?" That is what we ask ourselves. We're not the end all, for civilization is always evolving, and though it's unlikely that our ruling will be overturned soon, at some point it will come back to us, only then it will be presented in a different way- and we will have to rule on that.

  Good day to you!"   

Tremors In The Force

    There's this undercurrent of sleaziness that has been encroaching lately, staining the corners of the fabric of society, and I don't like it. 

Takes a lot of water and suds to blot it out and then soon as you do, it starts creeping in from another angle. 

      I can sense this stain hovering in the shadows, trying to edge it's way in, but light and dark can't coexist. The stain thinks it can somehow figure out a way to be 'acceptable' but plain and simple, though numerous efforts are made to try and explain how the stain 'fits', people just can't turn off their senses. 

Their eyes can see the stain and try, as they are coached to by some, to interpret the stain as appropriate, suitable, or tolerable but nah, they can't see it that way. Ugly is ugly.

  Their ears can hear the sounds the stain makes (it makes sounds) but the stain's discordant notes jangle and wear upon listeners. The grating and irritating tones the stain makes cause only anguish.

The taste the stain has dampens any enthusiasm for another helping, completely dulling the appetite,

while the feeling the stain has is oily and wretchedly bumpy, like the tortured hide of a swamp creature, 

and the smell (oh the smell!) of the stain is beyond words. 

Princess Leia knew. Absolutely.

Mnm all- Unsplash.com

But even more than that, there is an energy around the stain that is foreboding. This energy is strangely hypnotic and alluring, like that of a snake, yet at the same time it is decisively abhorrent. Everybody has been exposed to the stain at least once, in all likelihood numerous times, and they to varying degrees recognize it and what it means. Obi Wan Kanobi could catch the tiniest wisp of the stain and it would drop him to his knees. 

  He knew about the stain.

  Luke Skywalker was innocent and protected, initially, from the stain and Han Solo was self absorbed and actually in league with aspects of the stain but for both, the true knowledge of it existed deep within them and that's why they did what they did…

  …for they knew, like Obi Wan did, that the stain is the destroyer of worlds.

Let's Get Serious

“it’s time to get serious!”

("U talkin' to me?”)

That's about how I would typically react to that sort of statement, for I am not the type to get serious about anything, though I can get serious. When it's necessary, when it’s crisis level stuff and I gotta kick in and do something, I can get focused pretty damn fast. I've done it before, I know the ability is there. But most of the time, 'not serious' is how I roll.

In fact, the many things in life that I'm 'supposed' to take seriously (that list being probably a few pages long) I've never taken seriously and, despite my cavalier attitude, I have survived. So there! 

But this is not about measuring my belief system against the ones that others hold, this is about something else and that is that Spirit is asking me, has been asking me, to step up. 

Now I know that sounds portentous, grandiose, and perhaps (perhaps?!) even egotistical, like I'm fancying myself some sort of Chosen One or something so I gotta check up. I have to take it slow- but not too slow- 'cuz Spirit is patient but not that patient. If I drag my feet too much they might look at some other candidates, that sort of thing. 

Mh Mehedi- Unsplash.com

Now I can't verify any of this but I can feel it. I've also been having significant ‘downloads’ and experiencing some pretty auspicious dreams. I don't know exactly what I'll be asked to do, if I'm asked to do anything at all, but whatever I'm asked to do if I am asked to do it is gonna be for the good, that's the feeling I'm getting about this. 

I also know that if I do step up when asked I'm gonna have to get serious and represent. Now that sounds ominous, huh?

"No more foolin' around! Get on task you (no judgement here)… ….you......

…slackers!” I might (lovingly) say.

A ‘slacker’ is what I was just last month, last week, and certainly yesterday, but won't be for much longer, it seems. But I could be wrong about this. Maybe my sense of humor will be heightened and doing what I’m called to do I'll be the life of the party but......

.....maybe not! Bummer City would be being like a school marm and looking over my glasses at miscreants and believe you me I would know how to spot them, having been one myself for many, many years. 

So what does one do in this situation? 

"Take it day by day" 

Good answer. Anybody else?

"Be open to it"

I'm already there.

"Explore the possibilities!"

I'm on it.

"Breathe"

You betcha.

"Ask- pray- for guidance"

Damn straight. 

I'm tellin ya, I'm serious about this gettin' serious. It's being asked of me and so far I haven't said no. It’s weird but not totally unexpected, as I have been pushing myself in this direction for a long, long time and damn if the train hasn't finally showed up on the horizon, chuggin' my way. 

(Ulp!)

Ain't dyin' now, if ur thinkin' that, that ain't in the cards. This is about livin' a life larger than the one I've been used to and fitting into some grown up clothes. 

All right I'll say it- some seriously grown up clothes. 

This is all about being a walking and (sometimes) talking embodiment of The Truth of one’s being.

I always thought there was more to life than what passes for life these days.

An Interesting Assessment

  After the totalitarian viewpoint was established, at least in their minds, they focused then on how to implement it. For when the focus is such there can be no compromise. The ultimate takeover of Everything is ego's desire to assuage fear by attaining control.

     In the ego's vision control over Everything is desired but Everything (that which is to be ruled) doesn't desire to be fed and led by the unwise so the only way the ego can achieve utter dominance is either by force or guile, the former unimaginable 'reality' being some sort of fiery iron-forging slave camp populated by Orks and the second unreality being the current day 'news'cycle double-speak that is glazing over millions of eyes daily on various platforms.

     The Orks toiling away in their sweatshop never look happy or even know what happiness is and the people watching and being taken in by the news on certain stations might as well have their brains shut off for they aren't thinking critically anymore, they're only taking in more content provided by 'experts' (and if you question that, we'll raise our voices!). 

No this is not Elon Musk but whoever he is he is an independent entity reasoning, something all of us have to do.

Quin Stevenson- Unsplash.com

     Imagine a world filled with the mindless and the subdued and the moon looks like it's a sister planet in comparison for, like there, nothing really happy happens here and if you think that that is not the case, that we have SportsCenter and baseball and 'What's new to see on Netflix' every week we're living large. To that I simply say "Bah humbug".

All of this is made up and if it's made up it can be changed and it does change, all the time, yet The World is kept within certain parameters for there is a lot of fear present on the planet still. The fear is not so much in the minds of the many but it exists strongly in the minds of the few, who want to see the old ways continue. 

  Good luck with that. 

  "Won't be the future for us" say the manifestors of reality (which we all in truth are). Some of us know that our thoughts create, and the rest are gettin' it. There's a huge steamroller of momentum building that says "No thanks!" to outdated belief systems and the shoddy structures that those create on always perilous presumptions. 

"Mind is the builder" Edgar Cayce repeatedly admonished to the seekers of understanding, not so very long ago.

Fear not what is outside of you, then, but that which is housed within your own mind.

Contentment

If I move away from the fast-paced world and prevent myself from exposure to the daily news cycle, push back from the offerings on Netflix and Amazon, try not to get pulled into the drama of the basketball and hockey playoffs on SportsCenter, refrain from touching upon any number of ultra-compelling exposes, reality shows, science-based explorations and the like playing on TV, set down the Kindle with it's many book offerings, turn away from the latest podcast, and not compulsively watch any cooking and baking shows, I find I'm pretty darn content. 

Which is puzzling because shouldn't it be the other way? I should be restless and agonizing, positively jones’n for a fix. Well, I'm not. Now how can that be, and more importantly, how did that come about?

Those are answers I cannot give for I do not myself know how I achieved, reached, or have been blessed by this state, which has been with me all of my life. "Born into it", I guess I could say. 

  But methinks I was so born because of all the experiences I had in my past where I was highly self-absorbed and very focused upon any number of outside things and through such involvement solved the riddle of contentment, which is a complex equation, or at least it was for me, one that held numerous variables and the weighing of values that resulted in 'those many things equal this' to me, for contentment is a highly personal thing. 

Putting out this content then is not something I feel I have to do, it's something I want to do, and I can drop this writing at any time simply because it doesn't add a great deal to the measure of fullness I already experience. There is some satisfaction in writing a juicy post, in somehow putting the words together that match the vision I hold within, but it doesn't change the sense of contentment I always feel much. Writing to me is sort of like a skills test, self-administered.

(So yes, putting out content changes me a little. I'll admit that) 

Is contentment a state of 'inner peace' that I'm feeling? I don't exactly know what 'inner peace' refers to. That seems to mean something spiritual and/or mystical, which is what contentment is not. Contentment is more like neutrality towards that which is, neither being for nor against, and not being very interested whichever way things go because contentment will inevitably follow, up to a point. 

A far away point that is fortunately never reached. It may be conjectured, surmised, prophesized, or forecast, but the human race hasn't gone the armageddon route so it'll always been unknown whether I could remain content in the face of that, thank God, so everything else is small potatoes and of little concern.

What things are like in the hobbit village.

Rob Mulally- Unsplash.com

Which is what contentment to me is, a generally good feeling that everything is going to work itself out and I'm doing my little part and that is all that is required because if I was to be on stage in some capacity I would be there and I'm not. I am not one so compelled. 

Blogging is my stage and I'm content with that, until I'm not, and then I'll find out, is another way of putting it. 

"Whatever floats your boat" is my philosophy. The Universe- that grand bringer of life and supporter of same- will see to it that I get adeptly placed. There's really nothing to worry about. 

Contentment is an opportunity to really enjoy things being just the way they are. In this state of mind you are able to step back, relax, and gaze upon the big picture. 

Stand Up Guy

     The things you can learn on You Tube....

     ....are a lot so, having an Enquiring Mind, and a rapid fire mouse hand, I can get through a lot of subject matter in a short period of time. Men are like that, this phenomenon has been long documented and exhaustively researched through various studies of men in the possession of TV remote controls. We just can't stick to one show (or on one page) for very long.

In all my skipping around on You Tube, I have exhibited a pattern, duly recognized by data trackers, I'm sure, of lingering overly long on comedy. I like comedy, but not too much of it (because there might be something else to watch, of course). But comedy is compelling. How do the masters do it?

This is a course of study worthy of the intent focus of a college level P.H.D. candidate for if you can figure out how to do stand up comedy, forget about writing any damn thesis. You can hit the road and the clubs across the land and live probably the coolest life, one equal to that of a rock star or sports hero. But your life is an even cooler one 'cuz you can run solo and not have to wrestle with difficult bandmates or deal with the press and have to give answers as to why you and your teammates were so sloppy on defense during that last matchup with your hated rivals- who you are sure to meet in the playoffs.

'Studying' stand up from the sofa then, or whilst in the hot tub, I have tried to make associations with the comics and what they do that leads to success and have come across some things that might lead to positive correlations towards same. But first, let's eliminate some common misperceptions that might be held towards the concept of 'being funny'. While these qualities, which I will duly list, can add some predisposition towards audiences' perception of you being funny, methinks they are overrated. First, the personalities and looks of comics are all over the place so I can't say those are big deciding factors. Second, whether the comic be male or female doesn't seem to matter much, except to the intimate degree of familiarity that each has with certain gender specific subject matters. Third, age doesn't seem to matter too much, though being young and hip seems to be more highly weighted, this only due to the fact that their audience is more likely to actually come out to the clubs whereas people of a certain age might not desire to leave their cribs. 

What does seem to matter in doing stand up are the following:

The setting up of jokes, then delivering them rapidly. Never making a misstep- fumbling over words, forgetting, or pausing- 'cuz if you do that you're dead. Speaking loudly and clearly. Positive 'up' attitudes, or relaxed and comfortable ones. (Nervous and neurotic can be okay too- so long as you deliver). Practiced physical comedy skills. The physical comedy you perform, as well as your ability to accurately portray the verbal and physical characterizations of other people and their reactions to events, can be killer. Ability to ad lib with audience members is another serious audience favorite and applause amplifier, as well as is adeptness in handling hecklers.

Simple observations about ordinary daily events seem to make up a lot of comedic routines so hey anybody can do it, right? We all have these funny, weird things happen to us, or we see and read about them happening to others. We amateurs constantly and breathlessly relate quirky family stories, work happenings, or news items to each other every day hoping for a laugh and we get them a lot of times but to take our jokes up on stage? That thought freezes us. Telling those same jokes to strangers is an incredibly daunting thing, we think.

  And the evidence supports that notion for stand up comedy is said to be one of the hardest things for a person to do. So why do the pros make it look so easy and natural, like they are telling jokes to their buddies, only instead of three people being their buddies it's three hundred?

N’er a rapper, a preacher, or a singer. A storyteller.

Jonny McClaren- Unsplash.com

It's said in the business that when you start out you get three minutes. You're introduced, get up on stage, fire off your jokes, then take a bow and get out of there, hopefully to trailing laughter and not raining tomatoes. The next level is five whole minutes. After that, ten. 

Assuming you've survived that, haven’t run for the hills, and desire to continue, you having endured the absolutely essential initial trials by fire every comic must face, you just keep building your routine and working the clubs until you eventually land yourself a Netflix special where you can knock out an hour's worth of material and make it seem like nothing. By then you've honed all of your jokes and have a set list in your mind. Delivering your jokes you know when to drop the punch lines, wait out the laughter that comes after each one, then you hit 'em again. Bam, bam, bam. Like a joke machine. 

That's what audiences want. A joke every ten to fifteen seconds. No long setups, unless you're near the end of the show where you're going to hit them with your best joke. The audience is in your corner by then, anticipating, and will weather any long introductions for the big payoff they know is coming.

Quite skillful, these comedians are. Under You Tube's tutelage, I have been applying this (I think) absolutely necessary like hack but, bruthah, I’ve got a long ways to go. My physical comedy skills need work and I know that 'cuz my audience only sometimes laughs, or they turn the attention back on them towards a completely different subject, which is painful, but that's the price wannabe comics pay. You get hit with a lot of rejection. But there have been those moments where I have experienced acceptance. Whatta feelin' that is, lemme tell ya!

Nothing's better than having an audience on their heels, laughing at a succession of your jokes, which is a feat I have many times accomplished but damn if I didn't stumble at some point and lose it, any further offerings screeching to a stop like a train wreck. 

I get spacey, you know (I’m a writer!) but that is an excuse unforgivable in stand up. You gotta be firing on all cylinders, pacing the stage, setting up and delivering constantly or you'll get feedback of the unwanted kind. You'll get dead air or even worse, heckled. Comics will tell you there's nothing worse. 

Fortunately, though, bummer ‘flop nights’ happen early on in comics' careers and most of the ones that do stand up specials film them in 'friendly crowd' settings, not in venues where they're unknown and the audience is fulla drunks. The people in these audiences clap politely, throw in supportive 'Woo-hoos!" or other validations from time to time, and refrain from disruptive comments because they don't want to break the momentum of the comic or keep themselves (or the audience) from being entertained, which is a very good energy to be in.

So. Stand Up comedy, huh? Don't know if it's in the cards for me, or if I'll ever get up on that highly portentous yet frightful stage, but I'll be practicing. Maybe I'll be able, through diligent application, to string together three unbroken minutes. That'll be a start. Then perhaps in my wildest dreams I could keep 'em rolling in the aisles for an hour and wouldn't that be somethin'.....

     …..’cuz you gotta have goals in life!

An’ bein' a Stand Up Guy is one so worthy.  

Tell Me It's Insignificant

My time with a small group of people is wrapping up. We've been working together for years but soon won't be. One has already flown the coop and the rest will be scattering to the four winds in a fortnight. 

Now when it comes to working together it's not like we've been all lovey-dovey with each other. There have been strong emotions and difficult times aplenty but at this point all of that is water under the bridge. Now we're left kind of staring at each other at times with these sort of blank looks, like when you look past or through something, your attention focused on that which you cannot physically see.

Strange, it is, how Life threw us together for a time for a reason that we thought we knew. It was all about the money, right? Just a bunch of random people filling slots that needed to be filled and we were the ones that showed up and said that, for one reason or another, we were willing to do it, something that the logical mind declares reasonable and understandable. 

But- is that the case? Was our gathering together a random event? All of my coworkers think so and even I, attuned to things non-physical and searching for any energetic clues, can't sense anything other than the vaguest possibility that there was any purpose in our gathering and working together. For years! You'd think that The Universe would let the cat out of the bag at this point, at least a little bit, and provide me with some metaphysical satisfaction but no, not yet, and maybe not ever.

  Couch it in whatever terminology fits your belief system, that is what those 'blank stares' are all about. Not really knowing, but sensing the possibility that something else might have been going on.

According to the business world, the business model, employees are simply commodities (the very definition of employ is 'to use') and nothing whatsover has occured other than we filled functions and soon won't. 

In a business sense, this is oh so true. Time and business forever march on, towards the future and the profits to be gained there, and you're either marching along with the company or not and if you disappear "So what?" for there are little emotions displayed towards castaways as a rule. 

But something did transpire and I can see that something- perhaps many somethings- in the eyes of my coworkers, that is, when we catch each other like that, which we are trying not to do at this time, because it's telling and uncomfortable. 

We have a sense of (Jeez can I say it?) camaraderie because we laughed together, and fought each other- a lot. Many, many times we were angry at each other, but just as many times we forgave. Or tried to. We worked together as a team and got the job done, despite the directives of management, who we knew didn't have a clue as to what was actually going on in our department. 

Many times, individually, we played the role of heroes for our customers, we went the extra mile because we felt it was the right thing to do (and maybe those customers thanked us for it). We dealt with lousy equipment and crowds and bad weather and all manner of things upsetting and complained about it but did it anyway. We did this so often we got used to it and called it 'reality' though we knew that there were realities far different that other people were experiencing but we blocked that out. 

Had to.

Through it all we watched each other and learned from each other because we were, like it or not, a team, a band of misfits doing a job that few others would have volunteered to do and those others thought not a lot of us as we were ferrying them around. They took us for granted and we griped about that and talked story and traded stories and I was amazed at what my coworkers went through as much as they were amazed at what had happened to me, before break, during the shift, or on the days that they were off.

Then at the end of every working day we went home to our respective houses and turned on our TVs and watched others living lives far more spectacular than the ones we were saddled with and ooh..... .....that was painful but as long as our bread was buttered we knew we were at least surviving. We had established perches for ourselves in a highly competitive, fast moving world and were loathe to go for better. However, when you make that decision it comes at a price because time keeps on moving and over the passage of years you go through stages of anger about your situation, then deny it's an issue before finally dropping into rueful acceptance, only wondering by then how those few at the top managed to do it because you certainly, at the time, gave it a go.

And now here we few are, near The End of our job, and in the eyes of The World we have failed at life and have to pick up the pieces and start over somewhere and the 'insignificance' of our existence is staring us right in the face- but wait!

The moment of recognition is undeniable.

Anton Shakirov- Unsplash.com

There is something there, it's showing in the eyes of my coworkers, in those of some of the managers, and undoubtedly in the minds of some the people we touched while just doing our job and that something is highly significant. We did make a difference in their lives (but we're probably never going to know what it was). It could have been just one thing that we did, or it could have been many things. The essence of who we individually are is etched into their minds, that essence being how we handled ourselves in combat situations, in bored situations, in charged situations (and in many other situations, those being too numerous to list). That 'something' we did is what is turning the gears in their heads behind that blank look these ones are displaying, it exists in that space where the processing of data is occurring but there are as of yet no words.

    I know what that blank look is, I've seen it before. We've touched each other, made indelible impressions on each other. We may have been accidentally thrown together in this life (which is my feeling, save possibly for a few individuals) but we'll never, ever forget each other. Through time and space we'll have the memory of each other and though faces will disappear and eventually bodies too it just might transpire that we will find ourselves together again, in another place and another when, and if that happens (and we're sensitive enough by then) we’ll remember each other by our peculiar energetic signatures. We might all join together for awhile in a different and probably higher in vibration setting to play out another drama or we may simply individually spend a few hours together but all the while I'll certainly (and hopefully they'll too) be inwardly nodding, like I have done many times in this life, thinking this:

"I KNOW you from somewhere!”

      I know you because we have spent time together before and this has separated you out from the mass of humanity. Other people will continue to be background characters but you will always appear different to me. This might just be in a general sense, as in I might feel a degree of familiarity with you, or it might be a recognition so strong that I will be able to pick you out of a crowd.

         In either case, I will know what kind of person you are- without you having to say a thing.

The Mystery Of Our History

Spent some time lately catching up on history, what's being newly presented about what's old in the metaphysical arena, as well as any current day scientific findings, and it's hard to discount what the evidence is pointing towards. A vastly different story than the one we were previously told. 

Now disinformation abounds, so navigating these waters takes skill and determination, but it can be done by anyone with a reasonable amount of intelligence because theories that point to preposterous conclusions can be discounted quite readily. Plausible theories are then left over to examine carefully, really pour over. 

Theoretical pondering about what has taken place in the past is not something I find terribly exciting to do but others seem to revel in the realms of archeological, geological, and anthropological focus. (Thank God that they are so driven for years of study and meticulous field work are as a rule required!) Many of these people are then compelled to collaborate with other experts and construct theories, try and connect the dots. The end results of their patient investigations, explorations, and research are they know what they are talking about. The foundation that supports their conjectures about what really happened is strong, graced by high degrees of credibility.

These degrees of credibility and subject matter knowledge enable them to easily withstand the attacks of low level critics, those who would offhandedly discount their theories. To the rest, those critics taking a more reasoning approach towards what is being presented, a certain degree of debate serves as healthy exercise for the presenters for it points out the weak spots in their theories and acts to strengthen them. This fortification process bolsters and over time creates ever more formidable theories supported by an increasing amount of evidence about what might have happened, for until all the evidence is in, no one can ever really know for sure.

That being said.......

.....it then follows that the idea that 'civilization' began on earth X number of years ago (roughly 6,000, as is commonly believed) and that any people existing before that were uncivilized bears (no pun intended) us to take another look.  

Silent witnesses. Just one of many ancient sites all over the world.

Jack B.- Unsplash.com

More has happened here than what we were told is my belief, and that comes from following people who have done the work and presented the evidence, evidence that is credible enough for me. I don't need to know every little thing that happened because if I know enough I can extrapolate the rest. Also, if the energy around what is being presented feels 'clean', that tells me that I'm on the right track. 

If it wasn't, I would feel compelled to dig deeper. 

So, kind of being ahead of this unfolding a little bit I can see that earth peeps got a lot of growing up to do and I don't mean that in a facetious way, a smart alecky way, I mean that in a compassionate way. Thank God we get time to process this 'cuz it's big, yeah, and it's gonna rock a lot of worlds. We're much older than we think and because of that we're a lot richer in experience and that prevents the worst part of our natures from coming out (true for most of us) which enables us to create bigger and better versions of what could be. That’s my idea of 'civilization'. We just get better and better at it because we've failed a number of times before and learned from those failings.

We've already learned the hardest lessons that could be concocted, tests we set up for ourselves, it appears, in order to see which way we would choose to go but it doesn't have to be this way forever. I think enough of us have learned what truly works by now and can take earth life up to the next level, the higher frequency, and as we do the full mystery of our history will then reveal itself because we'll be ready to finally know..... 

......’Humanity- The Rest Of The Story’ 

P.S.- I had a sneak peek of the trailer. This movie is going to pull out all the stops, there’s never been anything like it. High drama, absurd comedy, poignant heartbreak, and supreme challenge abounds. It’s going to be very long but, man oh man, it’s a must see.

Dreams

     I am an avid dream follower. Every night before lights out I program myself to remember my dreams and that has worked fairly well for a long time. I don't remember the entirety of what I have been dreaming about but usually I will get some final image or scene, full of emotion and tendrils of understanding, that makes no sense whatsoever when I initially wake up but over time (not a lot) I can allow some meaning, significance, theme, and/or essence to present itself out of what I 'saw' just before waking. Dream interpretation is tricky so use all the tools. Allow is the key word. However you get there (to comprehension) doesn’t matter so long as you get there.

     A lot of dream stuff is symbolic, as if it is in code, so my technique is I have to sort of ‘triangulate’ feelings, physical sensations, associations with various characters in the dream (be they presently alive or long ago dead, as well as any odd behaviors they were exhibiting), in addition to any other bits of information in order to hopefully ‘get the message’. This is great fun and of course highly insightful. Remembering dreams can also, if you track them over time, start to reveal patterns. Recurring dreams and recurring themes arise on numerous evenings to show that you're still working on an issue and that you are making progress towards resolution. Non-progress is also possible, but who wants that? The impetus is to grow, to expand, and to deepen. Positive energy heads in that direction. It would be extremely hard for me, like it probably is for most people, to override built-up momentum and go the other way. 

       Lately my dreams have been many. I sense my dreams have been very active ones, that is, filled with bustle and people, like being in a crowded room or engaged somehow in a busy town, but I can't remember anything about what I was so involved in seconds ago 'cuz I forget them soon as I wake up. Try as I might, I cannot grasp the tiniest thread and pull on it that leads me into some sort of memory about what I was dreaming about. Usually, this is not the case, for by staying quiet and focusing I remember much, much more but lately, nothing. Zipola. Yeah, this is frustrating but I have experienced periods of non-remembering before. Whatever it is that I'm dreaming about is something I'm not supposed to know yet or it doesn't concern me. Perhaps I’m helping others. 

     The feeling then is that I'm living two lives, one in the waking state and a very different one in the sleeping, states so different that I am unable to recognize one while being at the same time cognizant of the other, know what I mean? They're that far apart. 

      So. Ride it out is all I can do before I'm ‘dream journaling’ again- and that's another thing I want to talk about. Writing down dreams takes forever and is hard to do, because you have to be conscious enough to write but not so awake that you are forgetting your dream. The just-wakened state is a nebulous, fragile, delicate, and very precious one. If your dream (or dreams, as many of them are linked) is a highly involved one the time it takes to write things down might have you forgetting pertinent details. Better to simply have a voice recorder near your bed that is easy to find and activate. First thing you do upon gaining consciousness is turn the thing on then mumble away into it. This is difficult to do, certainly, if you're in a shared sleeping situation because you will sound and look silly doing this but hopefully if you have a partner who understands that this is important to you they can overlook it, maybe by falling back asleep (or even mumbling into their voice recorder). Either way, just mumble away quietly. 

Dreamcatcher deployed.

Nazym Jumadilova- Unsplash.com

Then, upon regaining full consciousness, say at least two hours or so, replay what you have recorded and be amazed at what you were oh so casually talking about then, astounded even, for what you said you would most likely never say in the fully conscious state. Unadulterated, your dream has been captured in its purest form. Further analyze, contemplate, or ‘process’ then ('cuz you've done so already, I'm sure) at will until you’ve exhausted the evening’s dream subject and feel done. Dream understanding takes time. Through a contemplative approach you just might start seeing patterns in your dream and connect the dots, bringing comprehension to what seemed unrelated before. If you cannot gain comprehension, let the dream go and see what happens. I’ve many, many times understood what my dream(s) of the prior evening were about late in the day during flashes of insight. Sometimes you just have to let events unfold.

I'm going to earnestly do voice recording myself for I have recently read some dream journaling I did a few years back where I was writing all my dreams down and it brought it back to me how much doing that served me (as well as entertained me), for the spirit realm is extraordinarily clever and can be quite funny, operating as it does completely out of time and any earth-bound associative rules. 

I know we all have a lot to do and doing this is just one more thing. Capturing dreams only takes a minute or two though. That’s not a lot. All you gotta do is push the button on the recorder. The real ‘work’ is listening to what you’ve said later and then thinking about it. My experience has been that doing so has been worthwhile in every aspect of my life and I wouldn’t let these nightly picture shows escape unnoticed back into the ethers for anything.